Proverbs 13:24
He that has not the courage or time to discipline his child…does not truly love him:
But he who loves his child…will faithfully discipline him…
And set up boundaries around him...until his season of training is done.
Every single home in America has doors and windows in them. These doors and windows have locks. However, these are not meant to imprison us, and keep us from enjoying the good things that are on the outside. They are meant to protect us from those outside elements that could be harmful to us. In this same way, we set up moral codes of a respect and honor of others…boundaries of morality…boundaries that serve as standards of protection for our lives…and the lives of those most precious to us.
How do we as parents instill in the hearts of our children these codes and standards of protection without abusing them, or building resentment and bitterness in them. Is it right to discipline your children, in a loving and controlled manner, when they step outside of these boundaries?
I asked a certain young man, what he and his wife planned on doing to discipline their young boy…as I could tell from his demeanor and present state…the future need would certainly arise. He told me that he and his wife give their son “Time Outs”. They make him sit and do nothing, until they feel that he has learned his lesson. These “Time Outs” are great tools for certain circumstances. But as I told this young man, the time and circumstance will come, when a "Time Out" will not give your child the healthy fear and respect that he needs to innately possess, concerning the dangerous and poisonous outside elements that reside within the bounds of this present world.
Most folks these days simply respond by saying, “We don’t want our child’s life to be built around “fear”. However, let me say this. There are some things of which …just plain and simple… a child needs to be afraid! There is such a thing as having a healthy sense of fear and respect! Children need to fear their parents more than a drug dealer, and more than their closest peer. They need to fear their parents more than drunk driving, or any circumstance that would harm them or someone else. A “Time Out” might keep a small child in check for a little while. However, it will do nothing for a hormonal teen that is beginning to experience uncontrollable feelings and a surge in aggressive behavior. At this juncture, they must already possess deep rooted morals and a tremendous sense of respect for the God-given authority in their lives, and the boundaries that lie outside of them. Without that level of healthy fear and respect, an undisciplined teen…is a teen that will not allow themselves to be shaped by the hands of those that seek to protect them…the hands that love them most!
Let us as parents decide today that we will coach, we will train, we will discipline, we will teach, we will do whatever is necessary to love and shape the future of those we care for the most!